Escalators don’t break down… they just turn into stairs

Because you should never drink and derive. She looked at me surprised.

Celebrate National Tell-a-Joke Day with these 25 corny jokes. 1 - The bartender is a blonde girl. "She said, "I'm Alexa you moron.". Chicken #2 – You are on the other side, stupid. “We don’t serve your type.” Check out these coffee puns for a while latte laughs. Q: Have you heard how popular the local cemetery is? Put lox on it. Don’t miss 36 more math jokes that will have you cracking up. A: It over swept. Escalators don’t break down… they just turn into stairs. Q: Why do Jack-o-lanterns have wicked smiles? “Why the big pause?” asks the bartender. Q: Why don’t skeletons ever go trick or treating? If you got a laugh from this, check out these other math jokes. I had a dream I was eating a giant marshmallow, when I woke up my pillow was missing! What did the police officer say to the midget complaining that someone picked his pocket? He was just going through a stage. What about a construction joke? Q: What is a vampire’s favorite fruit? Q: Why did the zombie skip school? Q: What goes around a haunted house and never stops? Q: Why was the broom late?

For more laughs, check out these hilarious cat memes. A: He is mist. A. I just love baskin’ robins. At what age is it appropriate to tell my dog that he’s adopted? In the riverbed. I’m changing! However I’m confident that most of them will brighten your day. A: Spooktacles. “I’m sorry” and “I apologize” mean the same thing… except when you’re at a funeral. Short jokes - funny one liners (1 to 10) - Short funny jokes.

Q: Where is the best place to party on Halloween? Because so many kings and queens have been reigning there. Thanks— I’ll never part with it!

People that get a crack out of short jokes will also appreciate these one-liners. They can also be introduced when there are awkward pauses in the flow of conversation, or can even be used to spice up a speech. Q: What monster plays tricks on Halloween? A: At the casketeria. Enjoy our collection of our short jokes, after all that’s what they are here for! A: No body. Short funny jokes give you a quick funny fix, so browse through our selection to find your favorite. If these short jokes are giving you a laugh, here are more dumb and funny jokes. I childproofed the house… but they still get in! Light travels faster than sound.

A: Boooooogers! Q: What do owls say when they go trick or treating?

Being short, they are easy to memorize and can be used as an ice-breaker with strangers.

If these short jokes are cracking you up, here are some dad jokes that will make you laugh out loud. Here are 50 bad jokes you can’t help but laugh at.

By Brandon Gorrell Updated October 30, 2018. 4 - The woman sitting next to me is blonde and is a professional weight lifter. A: You never know which witch is which! A: Ghoul scouts. Have you heard the one about the guy in the wheelchair? I don’t know, but the flag is a big plus. A: Because they’re too wrapped up in themselves.

If you like these short jokes, check out more funny puns here. Shutterstock. Now that you’ve learned 101 new short jokes to share with your friends, take a look at these cat cartoons that all cat lovers will appreciate.

A: Ma-scare-a. With a cowculator.

2. Like animal jokes? If you’re a word nerd, here are 20 grammar jokes that are hilarious. Here are 17 horse jokes you can’t help but laugh at.

The doctor replies, “Sorry, I don’t follow you …”. Long story short: Jokes come in all shapes and sizes. They don’t meet the koalafications. Q: What does a witch use to do her hair? Q: What Halloween candy is never on time for the party? A: The grim sweeper. These are the funniest jokes about all 50 U.S. states. I don’t know why” By Alex Nelson. Look carefully the picture and guess the game name. “I’m not sure; I was born with them.” Sick? Because every play has a cast. 1. Hey, haven’t we metaphor? Q: What would be the national holiday for a nation of vampires? A: The crossing gourd. A: Boo jeans. A cat has claws at the end of paws; A comma is a pause at the end of a clause. A: Because they just had their brains scooped out! Don’t miss these other science jokes every nerd will appreciate. We never knew he was a drunk… until he showed up to work sober. Did you hear the one about the rope? “Make me one with everything.” 2. I used to think the brain was the most important organ. A: Bam-BOO! 50 Short, Clean Jokes And Puns That Will Get You A Laugh Every Time By Brandon Gorrell Updated October 30, 2018. Skip it.

A: It’s a pain in the neck. A: A broom closet. 3 - I'm a 6-foot tall, 200-pound blonde woman with a black belt in karate. What did the Buddhist ask the hot dog vendor? Because they make up everything. Q: What did one ghost say to the other? There’s no menu: You get what you deserve. A: The g-RAVE-yard. These doctor cartoons will help you laugh through the pain. These love and marriage cartoons are hilariously accurate. 2.

If I’ve told you once, I’ve told you a million times don’t exaggerate! A gummy bear. Eileen. Here are some more of our favorite chemistry jokes ever. I used to be in a band, we were called ‘lost dog’. Q: What fruit do scarecrows love the most? Q.

How did the blonde die while drinking milk. A: A blood orange. A: He felt rotten. Not to mention, short jokes are easier to remember.

Q: What kind of music do mummies like listening to on Halloween? A: Trick or trout. We are no longer supporting IE (Internet Explorer) as we strive to provide site experiences for browsers that support new web standards and security practices. He’ll stop at nothing to avoid them.

rd.com I tried to sue the airport for misplacing my luggage. Q: Who did Frankenstein go trick or treating with? These Pokemon puns are too funny not to laugh at.

Once. Well, perhaps not all of them. A: A fence. Q: What makes trick or treating with twin witches so challenging? These jokes are less 300 chars long, so easy to remember! These bird puns will quack you up. Q: What part of the street do vampires live on? Check out the favorite hilarious jokes of famous comedy writers. Q: What do you give a vampire when he’s sick? Check out these pizza puns for supreme laughs. Q:How do you fix a cracked pumpkin? 5. A little horse. If a woman says she'll be ready in 15 minutes, she will be...There's no need to remind her every half hour. A: Ghoulie. You probably saw our posters. If these short jokes aren’t making the work day go by faster, try these work cartoons to help you get through the week. A blind man walks into a bar….And a table, and a chair. A: Straw-berries. "I said, "Oh sorry, I thought you worked here...”, I asked my phone, "Siri, why am I so bad with women? Try these other silly jokes for kids. Envelope. A: A sand-witch! Q: Q: Why did the vampire need mouthwash? The baa baa shop! These daily life jokes will give you even more to laugh about. So today I offer you 25 great funny short jokes that are guaranteed to brighten your day. Q: What does a panda ghost eat? Because he was always spotted.

A: Dayscare centers! 1. Q: Why do you always find things in the last place you look? Q: Why is a cemetery a great place to write a story? Browse through the directory of thousands of jokes added everyday and enjoy the joke of the day. Q: Why did the headless horseman go into business? 6. I intend to live forever… or die trying. These funny photos will crack you up. Q: Why don’t mummies have friends? But I am slowly getting over it. I intend to live forever… or die trying.

A: Because they are a pain in the neck. I can’t wait to see her face light up when she opens it. Q: Who won the skeleton beauty contest? A: Fangs-giving!

But sometimes, it's the simple, to-the-point one-liners that are funniest. A: Booberries! Q: Which type of pants do ghosts wear to trick or treat? If you laugh at these dark jokes, you’re probably a genius. A: Pumpkin-pi! Have you ever talked to a lawyer? For days he kept leaving little messages around the house. A: Choco-LATE! I’ve been digging around looking for funny short jokes that might just help readers to relax a little.

A: Because they have no-body to go with. Q: What did the fisherman say on Halloween? You’ll also want to see these funny animal memes. Q: What do you call a cleaning skeleton? 10. Re-Morse code. 9. “Get out of here!” shouts the bartender. An impasta. We recommend our users to update the browser. Cracking up at these dark jokes? Q: What is a ghost's nose full of? Now I just have beer.

We never knew he was a drunk… until he showed up to work sober. A: He wanted to get ahead in life. The next time you would be subtracting 10 from 90. 4. A clear conscience is usually the sign of a bad memory. Q: What type of plants do well on all Hallow’s Eve? Q: What kind of food would you find on a haunted beach? A: Because he had bat breath. How do ghosts search the. A: Rice Creepies. Never mind, it’s too lame. Q: Where do baby ghosts go during the day? A: Wrap music. These are the jokes listed 1 to 10. A: People are just dying to get in. Q: What position does a ghost play in hockey? Q: Who do monsters buy cookies from? Q: Where do ghosts go on holidays? “I’m sorry” and “I apologize” mean the same thing… except when you’re at a funeral. Q. Control Freak. “Those are just contractions.” These funny jokes can help you defuse any awkward work situation.

Q: Why do ghosts like to hang out at bars? Q: Why do ghosts go on diets? Once my dog ate all the Scrabble tiles. If these short jokes aren’t enough, read up on witty bar jokes anyone can remember. You can’t help but laugh at these summer cartoons. Q: Where do ghosts buy their Halloween candy? Q: What's a witch's favorite makeup? So I was in the chemist lab and I said to the assistant, “What gets rid of germs?”She said, "Ammonia cleaner. Who’s there? A: Happy Owl-ween! These jokes are less 300 chars long, so easy to remember! Q: What do you get when you divide your jack-o’-lantern’s circumference by its diameter? A: They’re afraid to unwind.

Everyone can relate to these working from home memes right now. A: Because all of the Boos. You planet. Q: What treat do eye doctors give out on Halloween?

Oh never mind, I’m still working on that one. Q: Where does Count Dracula usually eat his lunch? Q: Why did the vampire read the newspaper? 3. A: At the ghost-ery store! If these short jokes aren’t making the work day go by faster, try these work cartoons to help you get through the week. Found that short joke funny? Q: What do you call a vampire that lives in a kitchen?

Check out these bread puns for the next time you want to loaf around. Don’t forget to read some of our favorite dog jokes.

We are no longer supporting IE (Internet Explorer), funny jokes can help you defuse any awkward work situation, favorite hilarious jokes of famous comedy writers, National Tell-a-Joke Day with these 25 corny jokes, 25 clever jokes that instantly make you sound smart, 36 more math jokes that will have you cracking up, 17 horse jokes you can’t help but laugh at, physics jokes every science lover will appreciate, work cartoons to help you get through the week, cat cartoons that all cat lovers will appreciate, Do Not Sell My Personal Information – CA Residents. A: He heard it had great circulation.

Need a break from short jokes? 4. A: His ghoul friend. You know why you never see elephants hiding up in trees? A: Prank-enstein! 5. Gets jalapeño business!

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